I Miss Writing

I miss writing. I miss my books, my characters, the worlds I’ve created. We writers are a strange bunch, aren’t we?

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I’m the kind of writer who edits and revises as I go—over and over and over again. I know, I know, you’re not supposed to. I’ve heard fellow writers and published authors at writing conferences say not to go back over your work until you completely finish it. But I can’t. My OCD doesn’t allow it. I have to revise as I go along. Sometimes I get sick of my books, my characters, my worlds because of it, and I end up having to take a break. Now, I miss them because they have long been absent. I have long been absent. I have no time. My day starts at 4:00 in the morning and usually ends between 9-9:30 at night when I collapse into bed. I’m going all the time. I miss writing. I miss my creations. I miss having time.

I don’t mean to whine, I don’t mean to complain. I am blessed, so very, very blessed. I’m just overwhelmed and missing the thing that has been such a part of my life for such a long time. I had a panic attack last week, the first one I’d had in quite awhile. Even though I am blessed and doing better, mental illness is still a part of me, too.

2 thoughts on “I Miss Writing

  1. The wonderful thing about writing is that it is always there, ready to be picked up again when you have a chance. No special equipment needed (well, maybe a laptop, but a pen and paper work just as beautifully), just you and your imagination. Sometimes stepping away from it can be a great thing for the story and give you more clarity when you come back to it. I hope maybe you’ll have some down time over the holidays and can go back to it, even for an hour. I’ve been writing a lot lately and have realized (again, lol) how truly therapeutic it is.

    Liked by 1 person

    • So true! About all of it! Every once in awhile I think I should stop writing because I’m not good enough, because it will never go anywhere, but then I remember that it makes me happy, that it’s my own personal therapy. So I keep doing it. And I do miss it right now. Hopefully the time away will give me clarity, and I can go back to it with excitement and new ideas when I do have time again.

      Like

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